I was introduced to Ho’oponopono at a time in my life when I needed some help. I was severely depressed and I was struggling with my self-esteem. I had just experienced a very bitter end to a long relationship with someone I thought I would be with forever. I was constantly battling with my emotions (trying to numb them all out in fact) and carrying the burden of blame. I felt hopeless.
If you have ever felt this way, you may understand how difficult it can be to bring your life back into balance. In my case, I feel like I needed to forgive myself for what I considered to be a flaw in my character or a failure to live up to some expectation in life. It wasn’t until I had recovered a bit from my depression that I realized that I had been carrying this imbalance with me since I was a child. I was actually attracting this energy to me because of unexpressed emotional trauma that I had yet to release.
There have been quite a few tools that I’ve used in my journey to recover and maintain a balanced life. Qi Gong, Tai Chi, and Kung Fu, exploring the now and meditating with Yo Hoon Kim, and lots of therapy helped me get back on track. I spent 3-4 days a week at the Taoist Institute in Los Angeles for 10 years and the simplest and most effective tool in my arsenal was Ho’oponopono.
I love you, I’m sorry, Please forgive me, Thank you
It’s just a mantra! What’s the big deal!
The big deal here is that it’s a mantra that you say to your inner child. When you compartmentalize your feelings, it’s like you’re leaving your inner child locked up and alone. You are ignoring your subconscious and when you ignore an important part of yourself, things can get a little crazy when those emotions start to well up. If there is a part of you that feels unloved and ignored, you may find yourself drawn to things in life that you use as a crutch or a type of compensation. That way you don’t have to deal with that wounded part of yourself. But when you start to acknowledge your inner child and validate their feelings, you can start reclaiming the energy you’ve been using trying to pretend like they don’t exist. You start to take responsibility for them and care for them. And that’s when you start to become free.
And what happens when you start to feel free? You are suddenly filled with an indominable energy! And that energy starts to radiate around you and it infects the people around you with inspiration. Then they start looking at themselves and (using your example) they start to reclaim their energy and the pattern continues.
The tao is all about balance. In fact, you might say that the tao is self-organizing. And since we are all part of the tao, you could say that we are all co-creating the universe. When we create from a sense of imbalance, we tear at the fabric of our lives to compensate for some hidden pain. But when we create from a sense of balance, we acknowledge our pain and our inner child and we work to mend the tears.
It can be very tempting to stay in a mode where our problems come from the outside. We become the victim. No one can understand our pain because our pain is the most special pain and no one has suffered like us. When you acknowledge your inner child and all the feelings that are associated with your inner life, you can start to take responsibility for everything that comes into your orbit. Accepting full responsibility for everything in your life can free you up to embrace yourself and love yourself and return you to a state of unlimited potential. The Taoists would call this the process of unlearning or returning to your truest self… the uncarved block.
I know it can be hard and it might even feel a little silly sometimes but this mantra and these concepts carry a lot of power and are worth looking into.
Book recommendations
Ho’oponopono: The Hawaiian forgiveness ritual as the key to your life’s fulfillment by Ulrich E. Dupree
Here’s a great article detailing Ho’oponopono: https://graceandlightness.com/hooponopono-for-forgiveness/
I Love You
I’m Sorry
Please Forgive Me
Thank You
This is an excellent explanation of Ho’oponopono from Moon Cho of Yin and Yang Living. The powerful Hawaiin spiritual practice called Ho’oponopono is the relationship between the conscious “mother” and the subconscious “inner child” minds, where the conscious mind asks the subconscious mind to release memories and data of suffering and pain. Through this process, you are tapping into your higher conscious mind to help heal your life and others around you.
Normally I don’t go for this type of thing but this song and video can be quite soothing, Give it a try and see if it has an effect on you!